Life isn’t like the movies and it’s not often perfect. There’s not much we can do about cellulite and blemishes and our partners won’t always tell us how amazing we are in the bedroom. However, if you’re suffering from a crisis of confidence in the bedroom, there are ways to boost this and learn how to own it. Here are some tips:
Pick up some erotica
Why not get your hands on a copy of Fifty Shades of Grey? Read some articles about sex, watch some porn together. The more you educate yourself about sex, think about it and do it, it will become more normalised for you and you’ll feel more comfortable and empowered.
Get to know your body
You don’t have to be a god or goddess in the bedroom, it’s enough to be secure and confident enough to know what you want and to ask for it. The first thing to discover is what it is you want sexually. Get to know your body by spending some time finding out what feels good.
Get dressed for the occasion
Before thinking about getting naked, why not consider dressing up first? Treat yourself to some sexy underwear or a silk robe that feels amazing on your skin. It’s about whatever makes you feel sexiest. Special occasions often require dressing up, so why should bedroom occasions be any different.
Give yourself a pep talk
Try to quiet that voice inside your head that starts thinking about your jiggly bottom or lack of six pack. Give yourself a pep talk to remind yourself of all your great traits and just how sexy you really are. You can actually create new pathways in your brain that shift you away from negative thinking.
Confidence in your health
A lack of confidence in the bedroom can be the result of anxieties over your health, in particular, concerns over past experiences that might have exposed you to possible STIs. The only way to feel secure in your health is to get yourself tested. For an STI test London, visit checkurself.org.uk/plus/
Focus on the pleasure
If you should find yourself having a confidence crisis, take a few deep breaths and then focus on your breathing. This will re-focus your mind back onto your physical body and the sensations you’re feeling when your partner touches you.
Channel your inner sex god or goddess
Until you reach full confidence, you can always fake it until you make it. make it until you fake it. Imagine a character who you think personifies sexuality and seduction. Channel them for a few minutes and you can even pretend that you’re them. Practice this any time and the more you do it, the easier you’ll find it to channel this persona when you need it.